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Asheville, NC

Last year when I was in Asheville, NC doing a pop up art show, I visited with a very long time friend who had moved there from Chicago a few years ago.

I've known Rachel for 20 years, since we both worked at a drag queen wig shop together in Chicago. Rachel is one of the most radiant people I know. She has traveled the world, studied with teachers, gurus, and shamans. She is always on the quest of further enlightenment and has so much knowledge to give.

We took a hike along a river and we were talking about life, and what was new since we last spoke. I told her of how I was stuck, and of the things I had wanted. I know a little about how when you envision the things you want, it is the emotion behind it thats important. When most of us envision the future, or things we want, we do it with stress because we are worried about how we will get such things. When you envision, say having and wanting more money, but the emotion behind it is stress- either because you don't have it, or youre worried about how to get it- You actually push the outcome of getting money away from you. Its important to envision the car, house, art (haha) you want with feelings of joy (not anxiousness or stress).

This is not easily done and takes mindfulness.

Something Rachel taught me (that I can not believe how it has changed my point of view) is this,

NEVER use or say the word "want".

When you think to yourself "I want to own a nice house" or "I want to be making a bigger salary at work", you are energetically pushing those things away.

The word "want" stresses LACK. It focuses on the idea that you currently LACK a bigger house or job title. It immediately causes stress and feelings of envy in others who have it,, and implies you are not grateful to the universe for what you currently have. The word "want" puts a heavy weight on your soul.

Instead use the word "choose". When you CHOOSE to have a big new house, car, or dream job- feel how much lighter and happier you are!! It takes away all stress of time frame- and of the "how"- and ignores what you "don't have".

It's a word of power.

Don't WANT better for yourself, CHOOSE better for yourself!

I have applied this to my life, and career, and its made a huge difference for me and my mindset.

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